How to Love Your Children Without Judging Them

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where someone was judging their children because of how they looked, talked, or walked? Would you ever judge your child this way? Believe it or not some parents do judge their kids and even though they believe they are providing constructive criticism, they are really giving them more insecurities than what they already feel or place insecurities they hadn't thought about.

Step1

Help them not hurt them. Let's say your child is overweight. Telling them that fatty foods are not good for them and that they can't eat too much of it, is okay, if you are leading the example and if you don't ban it from their diet. But if you eat fatty foods without restrictions your child is not going to know what is right or wrong and there is a chance they'll eat more because of it. Eating out one or two nights a week and making healthier meals the rest of the week, will help your child cut down on bad eating habits.

Step2

Support your child in discovering their talent. Your child wants to play a musical instrument or wants to sing in the school musical. You don't care for instruments and you wouldn't be caught dead singing on stage, but the best thing to do would be to let them try it. Trying to persuade them not to do it because you think your child is not good enough is not the best thing, because even if they take it as good criticism, they could still hold it against you for the rest of their adult life. Who wants to hear that you were the reason for them not reaching their potential?

Step3

Respect who they will become. Your child is in high school already and suddenly they want a change in wardrobe, hairstyle, hair color, jewelry etc. What would be the harm in letting them express their individuality? As long as they are respectful to you and others, are not in trouble with the law or in a gang, letting them be who they are can help them discover who they will become. They could end up being a manicurist, hairstylist, tattoo artist, or fashion designer.

Step4

Treat them as any child even if they have a disability. Even if your child has a learning disability, Attention deficit disorder, autism, or is in a wheelchair shouldn't stop you from supporting what they want to do. Children with disabilities can do things like play in sports, or swim just like everyone else. There will be limitations on what they can do, but just the fact they you are helping and supporting can boost their self esteem ten times higher than telling them there disability won't let them do things that other children can.